Emotional rediscretion: self-awakening behind the glass scratches
Today's discussion of a topic reminds me of what happened the previous few days. I would like to revisit all the experiences, which will only become experience in the course of the revisiting. Every writing is also reshaping our “occupying” to make it happen for me。
Last sunday, i used a gas station self-washer. After the car was washed, several scratches were found on the front glass. It was supposed to be stains, but it wasn't. I immediately wondered if i was scratched while washing the car. That's when my husband called, so i told him. He said that i wanted to go to someone else, but it was hard to say, after all, there was no proof. I thought it was true, and then i hung up. But after i hung up on the phone, i thought i'd like to ask the car washman at the gas station if his machine is in trouble — and there's a queuing car washing in the back, which was my first thought。
When he reached the car wash site and explained the situation to the staff, he showed me his car wash brushes, which they could not have done. And i said to him, "you can say that. If there's something wrong with your machine, there's something wrong with the back car, and you'd better check it out." and he asked me if it's my brush. I'm going home, too。
On the way home, my husband called again, and i said they asked us to check the brush. I suddenly remembered that this was the last time i said i'd change it, and it hasn't changed since. One of them is not clean, and it is already unknown when it happened. At this point, my complaints about my husband were picked up: i've been busy all day, and there's something i can't count on。
You see, isn't the mood weird? It was true that all unexpressed emotions, not disappearing, were buried and then erupted in the ugliest way. These scratches are not basically a question of a rainbrush, but at this point, the conflict has pointed to the problem of a husband not changing a rainbrush. - it is, to be precise, a complaint that husbands are not dealing with family maintenance in a timely manner. He hung up without saying a word。
At this point, my heart was filled with anger, and then i started grunting. Sometimes it's true that when your anger breaks down, you can't stand it anymore. We can find a place where no one else can, or we can sit in a car and yell at each other, and we can leave all the restrictions, whatever. When i was out, i said, "what are you doing?" you're sick. You're sick. Do you feel it? Then i said to myself, "sorry, excuse me. Thank you. I love you." - love your spell。
It's amazing how you can't take care of yourself when the negative emotions are stuck in your heart. You can't feel the body now. When i link myself to the inside, i start to return to myself, to embrace the emotions that i have now, to embrace every real feeling that i had at the time — anger, anger, complaint..
After the admission, there's a thought in my head: grateful husband. Isn't it not worth my gratitude that i came out this morning, that he was alone with two kids and had lunch and waited for me to eat? Isn't it just a car glass? It's a scratch. What's the big deal? Even if it's broken, i'll buy another one. But why are we both so angry about problems that can be solved with money。
So i figured out the first thing to do when i went home was to thank my husband, and the second thing to talk to my husband: i don't get angry, i don't fight, i don't fight. Throughout the process, i was the only one who had experienced emotional ups and downs, and my husband didn't even know what was going on. That's what mr. Zhang devin said: “honey, there's no one else outside, only us.”
In this process of self-admission, i have a deep realization:
We must accept ourselves. In that moment, you are not a mother, you are not a daughter-in-law, you are only yourself, you are the only one. In that moment, you're doing everything right. You've done the best you can. It is this support, permission and acceptance that will remove the conflicts and obstacles that are inherent in us. At that moment, i found out that when i threw out old emotional garbage, there was room for good feelings。
Secondly, each of our emotions is creative。
So don't rush out, don't fight. When it came, we tried to say to him, "welcome, welcome, welcome... I know you're here to give me presents. Come on, welcome." to explore the psychological needs behind each of our immediate emotions. Every emotion is a gift waiting for us to unpack the layer. Until you get this gift, the emotional mission ends。
Thank you, i love you, but whoever sees this article is the lucky one, welcome it, bless you, and bless myself。
